This past spring we enclosed our deck in hopes of transforming it from an unused outdoor space to a screened-in porch we can enjoy almost year-round. And, as the morning and evening temperatures have started cooling, this outdoor room has become my favorite spot to hang out.
The only problem is that I don’t do leisure very well. I don’t know if it’s some form of adult-onset ADD or if it’s just a personality quirk, but sitting still makes me anxious about all the things I should and/or could be doing with time. My own need to “buzz around” {as the Spouse refers to it} is distracting and often counterproductive to being with and enjoying the people around me. Not to mention, it doesn’t set a very good example for three girls {plus one dog} who all have a natural inclination to bounce off the furniture.
A few years ago we dressed up as a family of bees for Halloween.
The poor Spouse. Never has there been a more appropriate theme for us. We can do some buzzing around here.
So, I decided over the long weekend to make a visible reminder of what the revamped porch was created to encourage. Rest. Stillness. Peace.
The 3rd Grader saw me working on the sign and said, “Why does it say ‘Be still’?” So, I told her it was a reference to a verse in the Bible where God tells us to be still and know that He is God.
She thought about it for a second and then sighed and said, “Well… that’s hard.”
Yes. Yes, it is. For you and me both, child.
I cannot get over the amount of pressure on families these days to have our kids involved in and excelling in so many different activities. How is it that a 5 or 6-year old child signing up to play soccer for the first time could be behind because everyone else on the team played in a preschool league? The same is true for gymnastics, dance, baseball, basketball, etc. We’ve created a world, at least here in the suburbs, where many elementary schoolers have already “specialized” in one sport and some even have a personal trainer to ensure they stay a step ahead of the competition.
If the sports and extracurricular activities aren’t overwhelming enough there are the new academic standards, the class/school emails and website updates about additional practice work we could/should be doing at home and flyers in the mail about camps and clubs and workshops on everything from etiquette to foreign language classes. The pressure is real and the pace is frantic. Keep up or get left behind. If you’re not involved in a lot of things, or at the very least excelling in one particular thing, you’re going nowhere fast.
In many ways, it feels like we’ve conditioned ourselves and our children to think busy isn’t just a way of life, it’s the best way. So, therefore, being still is being idle… irresponsible… even lazy. I mean if we’re going to be sitting down we should at least be reading something or scrolling through our phones or iPads for news, status updates, or some other form of education, entertainment or enlightenment.
I am the worst offender in these matters. I’ve bought into all the pressures and find myself with little if any attention span when forced to be still. Like the 3rd Grader observed, it’s just hard.
But, I know it’s good. I believe in Sabbath. I just don’t practice it well. One of my favorite bloggers {Emily Freeman} often shares thoughts about the need our bodies and souls have for rest, and she says,
“If our souls aren’t given a little room to breathe, they will suffocate beneath the heavy pressure of our fast-moving world.”
I think she’s right. And no one wants to suffocate.
Whether you’re eight or almost thirty-eight, being still can be hard. But, sometimes hard is good. And, this family needs to practice being still on occasion so our not-so-still hours of the day and week will flow more smoothly. I don’t expect a little wooden to sign to work magic on us, but I’m hoping its presence out there will convict us from time to time.
We shall see.
In unrelated news, here are a few of my favorite conversations from the week:
After church on Sunday…
Me: How was your class today?
The 1st Grader: Good. My teacher was Graham. He’s from Maine.
Me: Oh, yeah? What’s he doing here?
The 1st Grader: He’s in grad school. I think he wants to be a pasture.
A pasture, a pastor. Close enough. They’re both mentioned in the Bible.
And, after preschool earlier this week…
Me: What did you all talk about today?
The Preschooler: Umm… we talked about us. I’m new-nique.
Her theme at school right now is “I Am Special,” and the word of the week is “unique.” Either way you say it, I think she gets the gist of the word. This morning when I went to wake her up from a deep sleep to get her ready to go to school she frowned and said she isn’t “new-nique” today. But, I get it. Some days you just don’t feel like being “new-nique.” And, maybe today is one of those days. It’s exhausting to be special.
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