Clashin’ about fashion…

Maybe because fall is in the air… or maybe because I’ve been paging through (unsolicited) clothing catalogs that have come our way in the mail… or maybe because the vast majority of my apparel purchases these past few years have been size 3T or smaller… whatever the reason, lately I’ve been feeling the need to perk up my wardrobe with some more fashionable pieces.

Since having children (and really, since forever, if I’m honest with myself), my wardrobe has been rather bland and very predictable. I have the requisite jeans, khakis, denim skirt, and little black dress. But, beyond that, it’s completely uncreative, heavily practical, and borderline frumpy.

So, as part of my quest to spice things up in my closet, I ventured slightly outside of my comfort zone and ordered one of those trendy tunic dresses last week. See the example below:

You should know that the Spouse has some sort of aversion to anything that hints of a need for leggings and/or tall boots. He likes the leggings/tunic look on our toddlers, but not so much so on his wife. Maybe it’s my chicken legs, I don’t know.

Anyway, the package arrived and the Spouse insisted that I try it on (in retrospect I should have known that this unusual request was undoubtedly only for his amusement). So, I obliged. And, this is the comment that followed:

“Oh, my gosh. You look like something straight off Little House on the Prairie.”

Ok. Fair enough. It might have a slight peasant-like look to it. But, based on my observations, this look is sort of in right now. Not to mention, Little House was a fine, wholesome show that, in light of our present prime-time viewing options, really shouldn’t be mocked.

As if he hadn’t made his point with his first astute observation, the Spouse then adds insult to injury with this:

“I mean it’s like you’re wearing an apron you sewed together yourself.”

Alright. Now we’re getting personal. We all know I neither cook nor sew with any level of expertise. Therefore, any attempt I might make to assemble my own clothing would not be pretty. AND, even if the dress did resemble an apron (which it didn’t), this would not be your grandmother’s apron. Puh-lease.

So, you see how this was going… but wait, it gets better…

The Spouse then adds:

“Why don’t you just shop at Ann Taylor? You’ve always liked that store.”

Now, there’s a great idea. Why did I not think of this before?? While it’s true that I have historically liked Ann Taylor and their ability to bring sophistication and femininity to tailored (one might argue over-priced) outfits, I have not found their selections to be particularly practical for my current life stage. See one of their fall selections below:

Because this is what every stay-at-home-mom needs to wear. I realize that the modern mom can be chic and fun… and that play dates have come a long way in recent years. But, really. Nothing about “dry-clean only,” 3-inch heels, leather, and hosiery mixes well with yogurt-throwing, PB&J-eating toddlers who need to be heaved in an out of car-seats, beds, and swings from dawn till dusk. I’m pretty sure Ann did not have my demographic in mind when she designed her new fall line.

So, you can see where we are here. Any hope for some fresh fashion being infused into this wardrobe is at a complete standstill until some agreements can be reached on the home-front.

What’s one to do? Suggestions welcome 🙂